10 Clever Hacks for Using the Ben Franklin Effect to Win Friends and Influence People

Ariel Leung
7 min readFeb 16, 2023
Photo by Scott Broome on Unsplash

Hey there, have you ever heard of the Ben Franklin Effect? It’s a cool psychological phenomenon that can help you build better relationships with the people around you. And let’s be honest, who doesn’t want to have more friends and influence more people?

The Ben Franklin Effect is based on the idea that when we do someone a favor, we actually start to like them more. This might seem counterintuitive at first — shouldn’t we like someone more if they do us a favor? But it turns out that doing something for someone else actually makes us feel invested in them, and makes us want to continue the relationship.

Now, the Ben Franklin Effect might sound like something that only works in theory, but it’s actually been proven in research studies. And the best part is, there are some easy “hacks” you can use to take advantage of the effect and build better relationships with the people in your life.

So, in this article, we’re going to take a look at 10 clever hacks for using the Ben Franklin Effect to win friends and influence people. Whether you’re looking to build stronger connections with your coworkers, impress your boss, or just make more friends in your personal life, these hacks can help you get there. Ready to learn more? Let’s dive in!

The Ben Franklin Effect: A Refresher

Before we get into the nitty-gritty of the hacks you can use to leverage the Ben Franklin Effect, let’s take a quick refresher on what this effect is and why it works.

The Ben Franklin Effect is named after one of America’s founding fathers, who reportedly used the technique to turn a political opponent into a friend. The idea behind the effect is that when we do a favor for someone else, we start to like that person more. This might seem backwards — shouldn’t we like someone more if they do us a favor? But studies have shown that when we do something for someone else, it actually makes us feel invested in that person, and makes us want to continue the relationship.

The reason this works has to do with our need for consistency. As humans, we like to think that our attitudes and behaviors are in line with one another. So if we do something nice for someone else, we start to believe that we must actually like that person in order to have done the favor. And once we believe that, our attitudes start to shift to match our actions.

So, for example, if you’re trying to build a better relationship with a coworker, you might ask them for a small favor — like their opinion on a project you’re working on, or their help with a task that you’re struggling with. By doing this, you’re signaling to them that you value their expertise and are invested in the relationship. And because of the Ben Franklin Effect, they may start to like you more as a result.

But how can you take this concept and apply it in your own life? That’s where the hacks come in — let’s take a look!

10 Clever Hacks for Using the Ben Franklin Effect

Alright, let’s get down to business — you’re here for the hacks, and I’m here to give them to you. Here are 10 clever ways you can use the Ben Franklin Effect to win friends and influence people:

  1. Ask for a small favor: As we mentioned earlier, asking someone for a small favor is a great way to build rapport and start leveraging the Ben Franklin Effect. Just make sure the flavor is something they can actually do, and that it’s not too big of an ask.
  2. Let them teach you something: People love to feel helpful and knowledgeable. If you’re struggling with a particular task or skill, ask someone to show you how to do it. By letting them teach you something, you’re giving them a chance to feel valued and useful.
  3. Seek their advice: Similar to asking for a favor, asking for someone’s opinion or advice on a topic shows that you value their expertise. It’s a great way to start building a relationship with someone and to get them to like you more as a result.
  4. Find common ground: We tend to like people who are similar to us. Look for common interests or experiences you share with someone, and use those as a way to start building a relationship.
  5. Compliment them: People love to be praised and recognized for their efforts. If someone does something you admire or appreciate, let them know! It’s a small gesture, but it can go a long way in building positive feelings.
  6. Share a vulnerability: This might sound counterintuitive, but being vulnerable with someone can actually make them like you more. By opening up and sharing a personal experience or struggle, you’re showing that you trust them and are invested in the relationship.
  7. Show your appreciation: When someone does something for you, make sure to show your gratitude. Thank them sincerely and let them know how much you appreciate their help. This can make them feel good about themselves and about the relationship.
  8. Do them a favor: It might seem like the Ben Franklin Effect only works when someone does something for us, but actually, it works both ways. By doing someone else a favor, we can start to like them more as well. Just make sure the favor is something you can actually do, and that you’re not overextending yourself.
  9. Remember the little things: People appreciate it when you pay attention to the details. Remembering someone’s birthday, or asking about their sick pet, shows that you care about them as a person, not just as a coworker or acquaintance.
  10. Be genuine: At the end of the day, the most important thing you can do to build positive relationships with the people around you is to be genuine. People can tell when you’re being fake or insincere, so make sure you’re approaching every interaction with honesty and authenticity.

So there you have it — 10 clever hacks for using the Ben Franklin Effect to win friends and influence people. Give them a try, and see how much of a difference they can make in your relationships!

6 Tips for Maximizing the Effectiveness of the Ben Franklin Effect

You’re almost a Ben Franklin Effect pro at this point, but before we wrap up, here are some tips for maximizing the effectiveness of this technique:

  1. Start small: Asking for a small favor or seeking someone’s advice is a great way to start building rapport without overwhelming them. As you build the relationship, you can gradually increase the size and complexity of the favors you ask for.
  2. Be sincere: Remember, the key to the Ben Franklin Effect is that it’s based on genuine liking and affection, not manipulation. Make sure you’re approaching every interaction with honesty and authenticity.
  3. Don’t overdo it: While the Ben Franklin Effect can be a powerful tool, it’s not a magic bullet. Don’t try to use it to manipulate people or get them to do things they’re not comfortable with.
  4. Be patient: Building positive relationships takes time and effort. Don’t expect immediate results, and don’t get discouraged if things don’t go exactly as planned.
  5. Practice active listening: One of the best ways to build rapport with someone is to show that you’re genuinely interested in what they have to say. Practice active listening by paying close attention to their words, asking questions, and responding thoughtfully.
  6. Be open-minded: The Ben Franklin Effect is based on the idea that we tend to like people who we’ve done favors for, but it’s also true that we tend to like people who are similar to us or who share our values. Be open-minded and flexible in your interactions with others, and look for opportunities to find common ground.

By following these tips, you can make the most of the Ben Franklin Effect and start building positive, mutually beneficial relationships with the people around you. So go forth, try out some of these hacks, and see what kind of impact they can have on your personal and professional life!

Conclusion

In conclusion, the Ben Franklin Effect is a powerful technique that can help you build strong, positive relationships with the people around you. By asking for small favors and showing genuine appreciation for the help you receive, you can start to build rapport and establish a foundation of trust and mutual liking.

But it’s important to remember that the Ben Franklin Effect is not a magic bullet. It’s based on genuine liking and affection, not manipulation or trickery. So be sincere, patient, and open-minded in your interactions with others, and be willing to put in the time and effort needed to build real, lasting relationships.

Whether you’re looking to make new friends, build your professional network, or simply connect more deeply with the people in your life, the Ben Franklin Effect can be a powerful tool for achieving your goals. So go forth, give it a try, and see what kind of impact it can have on your relationships and your life as a whole!

--

--

Ariel Leung

Founder of Planty Lab | Retail Invester | Option Trader | Consultant